For the last time, I'm NOT PREGNANT!!!

To say the least...it has been one hell of ride since I updated last. Here's just a snippit of my time since my last update...

**I'm waiting for a call back from the endocrinologist to see what he wants to do because all of my lab work came back normal that he sent me for. Does this present a pickle? Bet your sweet patookers it does because I'm showing signs that I've got too much of the steroid in my system (which is just as bad as not having enough).

**I lost a dear sweet co-worker and friend on May 8th. Frank was hands down one of the sweetest and funniest people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and he will truly be missed by all who knew him. Frank and I would joke around that I was his work wife...and for the most part, I was. I think out of all of us who worked with him, he and I were the closest. Rest in peace my dear friend.

**I never quite realized how rude and inconsiderate some people are. I had, yet again, 2 people over the weekend ask me if I was expecting. One even went as far as placing her hand on my abdomen (yes, you read that correctly), asked me if I was expecting and when I told her no, she asked if I was sure. How freakin rude is that? I had another one yesterday ask me if I was expecting and I said, "Nope, just fat. I've got issues with my adrenal glands that make me look like I'm pregnant" and she left it at that. But for the other chick to question the answer that I gave her is flat out rude! What ever happened to manners in today's society? I'm for free speech and all, but damn...there's a line between free speech and making yourself look like an ass!

**Classes are going along as best they can be. My current class may end up being the death of me yet (although I'm waiting for my Senior Seminar Class because it will be my last class!!). If I plan things correctly, I'll be graduating in January 2013 with my bachelor's in psychology and starting my masters' that fall. By that time, we should be in our house and hopefully on our way onto parenthood.

Mother's Day for a childless mother

I honestly think that this is the first time that Mother's day this year is depressing the hell out of me. I'm used to the fact that my own mom lives over 2 hours away and makes no effort to come up here--that's not what upsets me. What upsets me the most is that I see everyone around me having children, knowing that I may not be able to have children of my own someday. Yes, I'm a mom to Buddy, but its not the same. I know that its not completely ruled out as of yet that we can't have children, but its not looking too good either. My endocrinologist sent me in for labs to try to figure out what is going on with me...needless to say, so far they're coming back normal (my one lab--cortisol--came back really low, but its supposed to because I'm on cortisol suppresion therapy for the enzyme blockage in my adrenal glands). I'm hoping we haven't gone through all this over the last year with the steriods for nothing and there may be something else going on. I know its something rather petty to be thinking about when I've got so many great moms in my life--bev, barb, lynn--but its not the same because I'm not a mom myself. I guess its just one of those things that will either come along when we're least expecting it, something we're gonna have to fight really hard in order to achieve, or have to learn to deal with the fact that we're not meant to have children. If we're not able to have children of our own, we're alright with it because there are plenty of children in the world who need a good home.

keep ya'll posted on how things turn out